Over the years, God has allowed me to experience and be a part of so much that I have not even taken the time to reflect on. My prayer in doing this journal entry is to lament to God and allow my vulnerability with Him draw me closer to Him.
Many of the experiences and challenges I have passed through or have witnessed have been situations where I am the foreigner. Often I feel overwhelmed, burdened, and misunderstood. But those are just feelings and emotions of self-pity that are dangerous to my personal relationship with Christ. He says: “Peace be Still” when I am frustrated and demanding for answers and an immediate fix or response to a situation.
God’s word says:
Tarry until… (Luke 24:49) Though it lingers (Habakkuk 2:3) Be still and wait patiently (Psalm 37:7)
These scriptures are clear in that we are to be patient. Sometimes patience requires endurance, perseverance, and self-control (Romans 5:3).
What I am trying to focus on is to be open and honest with Jesus. I desperately need to be more consistent in my prayer life rather than my self-pity parties…. Cast anxieties on Him in prayer and petition. (Philippians 4:6)
Jesus lamented to God. He cried out in agony and desperation. Jesus did this because He was fully human. He felt brokenness and true separation on the cross. Yet, He endured it and considered it His privilege to suffer on OUR behalf. He knew His purpose given to Him by God. He also knew it would not be an easy “quick fix” to all the world’s problems. He spent 3 years traveling around investing in people, listening, teaching, healing, and loving. He never grew tired or weary because He drew His source of energy from God Himself through consistent prayer and petition in solitude. In the Gospels, it is revealed throughout how Jesus would withdraw from the crowds and His closest friends to be alone with God.
I need to do this more! But I need to do it as Jesus did. I cannot be selfish or lazy with the alone time I do get, which has been a weakness of mine. I can easily fall into the temptation of thinking I deserve time away from all the chaos to do “self-care”. But that is not healthy or helpful, unless I humble myself before the Lord and lament to Him to fill me with His presence and cry out THY WILL BE DONE!
Life in Ghana is at times difficult and demanding whether it is physically, emotionally, or spiritually. I cannot allow myself to be feel pity because…. The family of believers throughout the whole world are undergoing the same kind of suffering. (1 Peter 5:9) This is true for my brothers and sisters here in Ghana, my family and friends in the US, India, Middle East, and the ends of the earth! We are all suffering somehow. But suffering is meant to strengthen our faith. I must come to peace and contentment that to lay down my life for Christ and to die to any worldly desires or cultural norms is to be considered JOY! I am able and have the privilege to be the hands and feet of Jesus and show love to the hurting because He first loved me!
(1 John 3:16) (James 1:2) (Romans 10:15) (1 John 4:19) (1 John 4:16)
Father,
Thank you for the overwhelming joy and privilege to know You and receive Your unfailing love and mercies. I am undeserving, but you continue to love me anyway! Lord I need your strength to press on towards the goal. May the faith I have in You be a light that will lead others to your presence. All that I have and all that I am is for you. May You be magnified throughout this world.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen
Chelsi
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